perception & icebergs.

(for a better reading experience, pop this blog up on your desk/laptop & grab a snack & come on back.. cause i’m bout to spit some truth.)

in my next 13 years, i hope that the man i will someday choose to love will see and accept me not for my curse, but as a blessing. i don’t want to be seen as my illness & i’ve also learned that i do not need verbal validation how sick i am or have been, yet pretend to be a normal functioning human all at the same time. i want to be seen as a wife, with a compassion for serving others, with kids at my dinner table, in a house that i own, with a dog sitting next to my front porch swing. i want to cross a thousand finish lines without raising money to find a cure for a disease that will be in full Remission, with hopes of being so much closer to a better quality of life with this illness. my hope is that in my lifetime, i will see better therapies, better care & more compassion to those living with illness – both visible and not so visible. i want to be healthy enough to take care of my family, be able to conceive children if God has this in His plan for me and i want my life to be more meaningful, grateful and full of.. well, life.

something very beautiful happens to people when their world has fallen apart: a humility, a nobility, a higher intelligence emerges at just the point when our knees hit the floor. – marianne williamson

for information regarding extraintestinal manifestions, visit:
Very Well -What Are the Extra-Intestinal Complications of Crohn’s Disease? 


8 thoughts on “perception & icebergs.

  1. This box isn’t big enough for all the love! Words fail me….
    When you were about 7 years old, I brought my Mom over to your house for a visit. You had a swimming pool. We enjoyed our visit but we’re both quite amazed at how you, being the youngest and the only girl we’re THE toughest little girl we ever met! We were amazed at the crap you threw at your brothers! Your Mom went in the house for a minute and I thought I’d have to call the EMT’s! Turned out this horse play seemed to be the norm… point? It’s that very same spirit that gets you to the finish line, the wedding, the hospital…..whatever you need to get done.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Amen. So strange to see pictures of yourself on FB from years ago and not remember what happened at the party or the event—just that this picture was taken in-between non-stop trips to the bathroom or fresh out of the hospital. And you hardly think “What a great time I had” as much as “how did I even survive that night without my body visibly imploding???” I know that things will start to look up soon. Time to find a new place for you to live your dreams with people who know and understand the whole truth of what you’re going through—and know how strong you are because of it. Cheering you on from FL, girl—ALWAYS!

    Liked by 1 person

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  5. Thank you for your story. I could relate with your story regarding all your symptoms and challenges. It brought me to tears. Crohns disease is such a difficult illness. Many people don’t understand what we go through. It has changed my life completely. It also changed my identity and self worth. I had to find myself again through spirituality. You are a strong woman and I am sending you love!


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